The quiet, the peace I am currently experiencing is heavenly. You see, my wonderful husband took our 3 children with him to the grandparents for the weekend. No fighting, no arguing, no messes being constantly made, no refereeing or intervening, and did I mention the house isn't continuously spitting out new messes for me to clean. The joys of being able to binge watch whatever I want, to relax, the absence of sound that allows you to actually think. Did I also mention, I had the most fabulous lunch with, a good friend at a nice restaurant, out on the patio. Freedom, mom time, me time. Whatever you want to call it, it is one thing every mom needs, every once in awhile. Do you make time for it?
Don't get me wrong, I have a very hard time letting my children out of my sight. I went back and forth about this weekend. Should I let them go, should I make them stay. Will my husband be responsible on the drive down and stay off his phone. Will he put my children before an email. I don't worry about many things, but when it comes to my children, I am an extreme worry wart. It is so bad, it borders on being an anxiety problem. The night before, I couldn't sleep. I kept envisioning every worst case scenario that could possible happen. Let me tell you, there are a few that are legitimate. When it comes right down to it, I have to trust that my husband will do everything in his power to keep them safe. He loves them as much as I do, just differently. Different is what makes the world go 'round. Just because he doesn't worry and do everything exactly like I do, doesn't mean he doesn't love them as much as I do. The question came down to:
1. Do I keep them from a 4-hour drive so I don't have to worry? Do I ruin their fun because of my temporary anxiety.
2. Do I let them go, deal with my temporary anxiety (until I know they have arrived safely) and get to enjoy a much needed quiet weekend.
Let's face it, most of us don't get a lot of time away from our mom and wife roles. It doesn't matter if you are a stay-at-home mom or a working mom, we are always thinking/planning something concerning our children, meals, school, sports, if little Timmy has out grown his underwear, or socks, or shoes. We are dealing with all these different things, all while dealing with our kids questions, arguments, homework, needs for attention, while making dinner. On top of also dealing with our husbands needs. Keeping all this stuff straight can make us crazy. Literally. I am not complaining, this is part of the life I chose, it comes with the territory and I wouldn't change it for the world. I love my family. I also love my sanity, which mean I also need to take care of me. So do you.
1. Do I keep them from a 4-hour drive so I don't have to worry? Do I ruin their fun because of my temporary anxiety.
2. Do I let them go, deal with my temporary anxiety (until I know they have arrived safely) and get to enjoy a much needed quiet weekend.
Let's face it, most of us don't get a lot of time away from our mom and wife roles. It doesn't matter if you are a stay-at-home mom or a working mom, we are always thinking/planning something concerning our children, meals, school, sports, if little Timmy has out grown his underwear, or socks, or shoes. We are dealing with all these different things, all while dealing with our kids questions, arguments, homework, needs for attention, while making dinner. On top of also dealing with our husbands needs. Keeping all this stuff straight can make us crazy. Literally. I am not complaining, this is part of the life I chose, it comes with the territory and I wouldn't change it for the world. I love my family. I also love my sanity, which mean I also need to take care of me. So do you.
I used to feel selfish for feeling the need for self-care. Just the thought made me feel so guilty, I would repress the need. I am slowly learning that self-care is extremely important for us moms. There are so many benefits, not just for us, but for everyone around us. Some benefits of self-care for moms are:
- Boundaries. This is huge, we teach people how to treat us. We spend so much time valuing everyone else, we need to make sure they know we also value ourselves.
- Self-care makes us better moms. If we never take care of ourselves, resentment tends to build.
- Builds confidence.
- Helps with stress reduction.
- Gives us a much needed outlet for hobbies, passions, friends.
- Sitting alone, for me, is so calming to the soul. Then again I am an introvert. I love the sound of quiet.