- Am I doing a good enough job?
- Are my children really learning?
- Am I making a mistake keeping them home?
- Should I push them harder, faster?
- Should I make them spend more time on math?
- What is wrong with me, why can't I get them to understand this stuff?
- Are they at grade level?
Deciding to gain an understanding of their current grade levels, we implemented MobyMax a few weeks ago. I have one child who I already know is behind in math, therefore the results thoroughly stressed me out. Not Good. It's not as grim as MobyMax makes it out to be, he is behind, but I failed to remember MobyMax utilizes Common Core. Personally, we disagree with Common Core, for this reason we abstain from using it. Math should be simplified, especially when a child has an aversion to it, why overcomplicate something that doesn't need to be. Now he remains in the room with me while using the program, considering much of the wording can be confusing, and instructions are not always clear. An argumentative child who insists he is right and the computer is wrong, makes explaining further difficult concepts delightful. Certainly, obstinance doesn't help soothe an unglued momma's soul.
Pulling my hair frantically on a daily basis lately, math stress is authentic. If a homeschool mother can suffer from it, just imagine how it affects our children. Feeling like a failure, and being apprehensive to declare my shortcomings, this article almost wasn't written. Logically, my brain understands it isn't my fault. My youngster experiences difficulties in math, part of that condition is mentality. I have a kid who feels like they should know everything, or ought to know everything. Therefore, this child has a tough time admitting they need help, or accepting help regardless of how I offer it. Frustrating, does not accurately describe this situation, exasperating does. Being so on edge concerning this, there are days it's enticing to approach a specialist for a Xanax script. Overlooking prayer as an option, as mere mortals do, I have forgotten to rely on our creator for help. Therefore, pride turned into my hindrance. It is difficult to lower ourselves, however in the event that we need to progress, that is the speediest approach.
The above article had an immense impact on my thought processes about institutionalized thinking. Therefore, I am contemplating deschooling the subject of math, for one child. Is this possible, perhaps, but success isn't an option if you refuse trying. Likewise, a recent article I read compared homeschoolers to entrepreneurs. The beauty of this being my school, is the ability to customize an education plan that best fits our children's personalities. I am my own boss, I may not receive monetary compensation, but I'm rewarded when I finally see that light, that sparkle, that heroic gleam of satisfaction when they finally tackle another giant. Getting to see the joy in their faces when they learn new, something that captivates their endless imaginations is priceless. A love of learning is paramount, it's what leads to lifelong learning. In conclusion, wanting them to learn means leading by example, therefore, it's crucial for them to witness me learning too. Suffered universally by parent and child alike, math anxiety is undeniable, thus children should know they are not alone.