I am one of those people who despise admitting they are sick. I hate going to the doctor. Healthy, that is me. When I finally broke down to call our family doctor to make the appointment, guess what happened? They couldn't get me in, because I haven't seen our family doctor since 2011! I am now a new patient. So, I ended up at the walk-in clinic. God has surely blessed me with wonderful health, he is good. At the clinic, the physicians assistant that saw me, told me I had a lot of wet, mucousy junk in my lower right lung. No wonder I have been so short of breath the last few days. It's not the fact that I am extremely out-of-shape. An antibiotic, Prednisone, and a strong cough suppressant is what they sent me home with. I thought I would be able to sleep at night while on the Prednisone, what a joke. The other time I was on Prednisone it made me so sleepy. Not this time. The first two nights, I couldn't sleep if I tried. Of course, a few hours before my alarm was going to go off, is when sleep would finally take me. Homeschooling has not been enjoyable this last week. Now, that we have established how crappy I feel, why have I even bothered with school.
Let's be honest.
- Pride. Not the good kind of pride, this is the kind of pride that gets in your face and won't leave you alone. Trying to prove, that pushing through every storm is possible. And it's going to be fun, even if it isn't! Feeling the need to prove to all the naysayers in our life (there are only a few) that I can do this no matter what life throws at us. Proving that everything is possible, even when it really shouldn't be. Pride is really hard to overcome sometimes.
- Doubt. As a homeschool mom, I am always second guessing my decision to do this. As parents, isn't it normal to second guess every decision we make already. When we homeschool, we have other "naysayers" audibly second guessing our decision to do so. As parents, people usually assume that your decisions are sound, and don't second guess you, until you bring up your school choices. If I can push through this sick, then I shouldn't have to doubt my abilities. I should start doubting the sanity of my decision to try and do a full school schedule. I should start doubting my ability to take care of myself, and stop letting the doubts of others control my decisions. The doubts of others, if I feed into them, usually ends up in me making bad decisions in order to keep the peace. I am learning, albeit slowly, to throw other's doubts about my abilities to the curb and back over them a few times (for good measure).
- Timing. Let's face it, I do not want to do school in the summer. I love summer. The heat, the humidity, the sun, they are all wonderfully relaxing things. I know some people homeschool year round. I have played with the idea, and we do a version of it. We call it "tiny school". We do the basics, reading and math a few days each week in the summer. It only takes about an hour, and we are done. The first 2 weeks and the the last 3 weeks we do nothing. We sleep in, we go to the lake, we play, or we do absolutely nothing. It is wonderful. I want to be done with school by the end of May if not sooner. That means we don't take snow days, or long spring breaks. We do take some Fridays off, and birthdays if they fall during the school year. The following video from the Holderness Family sums up what our school year looks like at the beginning and at the end.
Next time you are sick, listen to your body and rest. If you are able to homeschool, take it easy, lighten the load, use videos. There are a lot of ways for kids to learn, most importantly they learn from watching us. I know I fail at this more than not, but our kids will learn to take care of themselves by watching us. I don't want to model to my daughter, that as a mom, she shouldn't take care of herself, that her needs come last. Because they shouldn't. If I don't show her she needs to put herself first sometimes, or she won't have anything left to give when others really need her. I don't want my sons looking for a wife, that always puts their needs ahead of her own. They need to see a mom who takes care of herself as well as everyone else. This is also a great life lesson for them.
Even when you are too sick to teach, you are still teaching them the important lesson of self-care. There are lessons to be learned everywhere, not just in books or curriculum. Sometimes we just need to think outside the box.